Shattered Wings
by Crimson2816
Summary: What happens when Duo and Relena leave their siginificant others for each other. How does that effect Hilde and Heero? Maybe they can find love in each other.
1. 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing in the slightest.

WARNING: Adult situations, and opens up with slight lemon. Please read at your own risk.

Shattered Wings

~*~

Emptiness.

Complete and udder emptiness is all I feel. Nothing mattered and I was so numb on the inside that I barely registered the stranger above me. I gaze up at him and notice the emotion flashing before his brown eyes; lust. As his pelvis continues to pound into me I tried to remember where I meet him. Staring up at his face again I watch the sweat slide down his right cheek and through my personal haze I recognize the scar. Now I remember being at the bar, sitting there in my red dress, which begged for attention, and him coming up to sit beside me. He's scar, white and jagged extended down the left side of his handsome face. He was sweet though. He talk to me like I was a normal woman, not some lost female trying to hide her pain in the arms of someone else.

I was forced out of my thoughts when I heard my own voice moan in ecstasy that I didn't even realized I was feeling. I tightened around him, felt him climax as well, then watched him collapse beside me. I just laid there, staring up at the ceiling, trying desperately not to cry. I couldn't believe I had sunk so low. Getting up suddenly, not even caring about my nakedness I dressed frantically while the man slept on the bed that I had just vacated. I had to go. Somewhere. Anywhere but here. 

~*~

I walked quietly down the rain-socked streets. Of course I was quiet, I was the "Perfect Soldier". I can't remember why the hell I was out here in the rain but I was. I remembered working out in my apartment...then what? As I look up I see the silhouette of a woman. I wonder for a minute what she's doing out here in this terrible storm but what should I care. 

As I approach her I see she's standing in front of a store, staring at the TV's in the window, which are still on at 2 in the morning. For some reason she seems familiar. But when I stop and glance at the TV's, that doesn't matter anymore. I remember why I'm out here. I remember what's been killing me for 2 long years now and now I know why she seemed so familiar. We both stare at it, watching the happy couple. Then she looks at me and I can see she's not the same person she used to be. Two years ago she would never be caught dead in the tight "fuck me" red dress that she was wearing. I couldn't see all of it because of the trench coat she was wearing but I saw it. So she was dying inside as well. I noticed the hickey on the right side of her neck, just bellow her ear. 'So how many have you?' I asked her in my head. I've had my fare share of those too. Her hair is long too. Even though it's drenched I see that it's down to the small of her back. But physically she's still the same. A little more matured but her eyes, the eyes that used to sparkle with laughter at HIS jokes are dark and haunted. Just like...just like mine.

~*~

I couldn't stop looking at him. He had grown up that's for sure. He wasn't the little boy anymore, at least on the outside. He was wearing a thick black leather jacket but I could see the slight bulk of his muscles. His hair was the same. But his eyes were darker, if that's possible. He looked lost. He looked...just like me.

I couldn't stand there and look at him anymore, to be reminded what happen two years ago. I realized now that on that fateful day I hadn't even thought about him or his feelings but I do now. I thought I had forgot but with the announcement today everything came back full force. I couldn't stand there any more so I pulled away from him and walked away. I wanted to go home and pretend that I didn't care. So that's what I did. I left him there in the rain and I went home.

~*~

Before anything is spoken she turns away. I saw the emotions flashing through her eyes and I understood how she couldn't. I reminded her and she reminded me. I never thought about her. I never thought about any of them anymore. Or at least I tried. I couldn't help but think about THEM but neither could she I guess. All I could do was stand there and watch her disappear into the night.

  
  



	2. 2

Disclaimer: The same…

Shattered Wings

Chapter 1

~*~

Hilde Schbeiker sat on the cold gray concrete floor working on an old motorcycle engine. This was her job, this was were she worked. It was a repair shop. A simple all repair shop. Hilde's personal expertise was in motorcycles, cars, MS's and computers.

When she had left L2 almost three years she had come here, to Earth. She'd never really lived on the planet before, even though she knew that she had been born in Germany. So when she decided to leave, to start a new life for herself she came to a place she's never been before. Now, Okinawa Japan was home. The city just appealed to her.

"Hil, do you have that motorcycle done yet?" Joe's booming voice asked over her loud rock music playing from the radio on the garage wall.

"Yeah, give me a sec. I just need to put this new spark plug in and it should run fine. Why? Is the guy here to pick it up already?"

"You did tell me that it would be done by today kid."

"Well, I had to debug that Preventors computer remember?" Hilde shouted a little, aggravated at being reminded at her tardiness.

"Yeah, yeah. Look, is it done or not?"

"Joe, just send the guy back here and he can test it."

Frustrated Hilde grabbed her wrench and started to screw a bolt back into place.

~*~

That's how Heero found her. Hilde was busily trying to finish fixing his bike, with her hair pulled back into a messy bun and a few strands hanging loosely around her face. She looked good so naturally, sitting there in a blue mechanics suit, the top part down and tied around her waist and a simple white tank top. He really hadn't expected to see her again. Two weeks ago, on one of the worst night of his life, he had saw her, standing in the middle of the street while the pouring rain feel on both of them. He had saw the hurt in her eyes that he also saw in his eyes later that night when he returned home and looked in the mirror. She had walked away from him then. Would she do it again? He was about to find out.

"Hilde."

~*~

She froze. She hadn't heard that voice in years but she knew it anywhere. It was like Duo's voice. She could recognize his voice almost anywhere. 

Afraid to look up Hilde answered him, "Heero."

'So she was afraid,' Heero thought. 

"I should be done in a minute. Sorry for the wait but I've been busy." Hilde said nonchalantly, as if she didn't know whom she was speaking to.

"Hn."

Feeling the butterflies in her stomach Hilde swallowed and wiped the sweat from her brow. She didn't know what to say to him. She couldn't understand how after two years of being by herself and not having any contact with any of the people that new her as Duo's girl, now, Heero Yuy of all people was showing up in her life. And not just once, twice. Trying desperately not to concentrate on all the difficult thoughts swimming through her mind Hilde spoke.

"Nice bike."

~*~

Now it was time for Heero to freeze. He had been contemplating on how to handle the situation. In all reality he didn't know what to think. He had left also, those two almost three years ago, and disappeared into the night. He actually traveled during one of the years, seeing the beauty of the whole Earth Sphere. After he buried the hurt he felt for Relena he joined back up with the Preventors. As much as he didn't want to kill anymore, he did want to defend what he had worked for. Just recently though, Lady Une decided he needed to be reassigned, bringing him here, to Japan. He hadn't even been here a month but he was seriously considering to leave. He couldn't stay here while Hilde was here. She reminded so much, with her gorgeous blue eyes that were so unlike Relena's soft sea green ones.

"Heero?"

Startled, Heero looked down, still with the mask upon his face, always hiding his feelings, and stared at Hilde. She was looking up at him with an emotion he saw as understanding but then she lowered her gaze, also hiding away what she was really feeling.

"Sorry again for the wait. I haven't tested it yet but I'm sure you won't mind."

Not replying, Heero straddled the bike and started it up. He smirked as it roared, purring underneath him. Looking toward Hilde again he watched as she smiled triumphantly with her hands on her curved hips.

Stopping the bike Heero kicked out the kickstand and propped it back up so he could pay for the service.

"Heero?"

"Hn?"

"I was just going to say, go easy on the throttle for the first few days. I emptied a lot of water out of that engine. It should be fine but I'm not guaranteeing anything with just an old model."

"Thanks."

~*~

She tried not to watch him pull away, tried not to notice how extremely good he looked in his Preventors uniform, his new found height and slight bulk being foreshadowed by it. She didn't know what the hell she wanted to do. He hadn't said anything else to her but she hadn't really tried to start a conversation with him. Feeling suddenly depressed Hilde went and sat down in her office. Laying her head back on the armrest of her small couch Hilde stared up at the ceiling. 

Sure, Heero had changed. His body had matured, as had hers, but the eyes, the same deep blue eyes she remembered about him was the same. He still carried the same disposition, but now he carried even more hurt. 

"Heero. What does this mean? I can't look at you without remembering Duo and his deist but… you understand. You understand how much it hurts." Hilde said the last line between sobs. 

Even after all these years the ache in her heart still killed her. The thought or remembrance of that faithful day still pained her. Maybe she would never get over this.

~*~

Heero sped away on his newly fixed bike and thought about Hilde. For some reason he couldn't stop seeing her. She was different. Sure, he'd always been cold, more indifferent, but she used to be happy, caring. Now, she had locked that part of herself away, like he had years ago. He didn't really blame her though. He had been there. He saw exactly what she saw, something that no lover should ever have to witness. Now, she was mature, independent, and somehow, still Hilde. One thing for sure, she understood. She understood the pain he had gone through. Maybe he would see her again. 


	3. 3

Six Months Later

The air was cooler now that the year had fallen into November. The leaves of the Sakura trees were falling gracefully to the ground as Hilde sat on her back deck early that morning. She was sitting on a lounge chair, her knees tucked up to her chest and her big knitted purple sweater was pulled over them, keeping her legs warm. At the moment she was sipping her coffee enjoying the crisp morning before her real day began. The wind blew suddenly and pulled through Hilde's long loose hair making her smile is genuine enjoyment of the simple things. 

The mood was broken though with the ringing of her doorbell. 'Who could be here this early in the morning?' Hilde thought to herself as she set her coffee down on the clear glass deck table and entered her small two-bedroom house through the sliding glass door into her kitchen. Walking to the door and opening it, Hilde got the shock of her life.

"Heero??"

~*~

Seeing the expression on Hilde's face was extremely comical but Heero didn't laugh. He was here on official business and as much as he noticed she was only wearing and sweater and some jogging shorts, he couldn't let his mind wonder. He was about to ask her to do something extremely difficult, even for him.

"Hello Hilde."

Trying to get over her surprise Hilde replied,"Hey Heero. Um, can I help you?"

"Lady Une sent me."

Those simple words meant so much. She knew that Heero could have found her all those months ago if he choose too. Like she could have found him, though it would probably been a lot harder. Having him show up at her doorstep in a pair of jeans, a plain black T-shirt and leather jacket had definitely surprised her but now, with the mention of Lady Une, she knew something was wrong.

Becoming serious, Hilde opened the front door a little wider and invited him in.

The first thing Heero noticed was that Hilde's house was neat. The living room, which was the room he had entered in to, was simple. A couch, chair, and loveseat. There were little things he noticed, like the stack of CD's in front of the entertainment center, the pictures that looked like family, and a bookcase filled with books. Not really knowing what to do, he followed her through the kitchen and back outside onto the small wooden deck.

Taking up her seat Hilde gestured to the other three chairs and drank her coffee.

"Lady Une wants you for an assignment." Heero said breaking the ice.

"I figured as much. It must be something big if she sent you here." Hilde replied already feeling the butterflies rise up in her stomach. She just had an unnerving feeling that something was wrong.

"There's been a recent threat against the Vice-Foreign Minister."

"Relena." Just the mention of that name strung a chord inside her heart that made her want to cry. But she wasn't so wrapped up in her emotions that she didn't notice how Heero's eyes darkened and his face became fiercer. 

"Why does Lady need me then?" Hilde asked softly, trying to bring Heero out of his daze.

Snapping out of his stupor he answered her as if nothing ever happened. "We don't exactly know where the threat is coming from. This group, which we haven't classified yet, is extremely deadly. They've been responsible for the 3 deaths of the colony representatives. We have reason to believe they're aiming for the Vice-Foreign Minister."

"Lady Une wants me to play spy for her huh?" Seeing the weird look on Heero's face Hilde continued. "You Gundam pilots weren't the only ones who know espionage. I was a soldier also Heero. Anyway," Hilde said depressed, knowing what was being asked of her,"Lady wants me to become all buddy buddy with Relena right? Act like I'm just an old time friend coming to visit her, it would work also if anyone checked my background. Of course the whole time I'd be undercover, being feed information and hopefully I would find these bad guys and save the day." Hilde finished dramatically.

"It's a little more than that." Heero stated.

"Oh?"

"I'm going with you."

Silence. Staring into his cobalt eyes, somewhat hidden by his still unruly hair, Hilde moved off her chair and swatted down in front of Heero. Reaching her hand out instinctively she brushed his bangs out of his eyes and asked him what he was thinking. When she asked she noticed the emotion flash through his eyes.

"Hasn't anyone ever asked you that Heero?" Hilde asked softly, wondering what he was thinking.

"No."

"Well, now I am. You don't have to answer but Heero, you know what you're asking me."

Unable to answer her he averted his gaze to the tree in small cubical back yard.

"Fine." She said turning away from him. "Tell Lady Une, I'll be in her office tomorrow morning to be briefed on all the information. You know where the door is. I'm sorry I can't see you out but I have to get ready for work."

~*~

He watched her go. He watched her turn away from him and walk back into her house. Sitting there Heero didn't know what to think. Yesterday when Lady Une told him his new assignment he handled it professionally. It's not like he had any personal reasons to decline the mission. The Vice-Foreign Minister was endangered and he promised himself that he would always protect her, even if it wasn't his job anymore. He never really faced the fact that he would be seeing…Relena again. Relena. The last time he had seen her, with her hair tousled and tears in her eyes, his heart, what was left of it, had been broken. That was three years ago now. And he had to face her. 

"I know how you feel."

Her voice almost made him jump. Standing there in the doorway, in jeans and a long sleeve shirt, was Hilde, looking at him with understanding.

"I'm sorry." She said hurt. "I didn't mean to be rude to you but… it's been three years and I'm still to weak to face them. I thought that after all this time I could go back someday and smile sweetly. I could face him and tell him that I was alright. He was nothing to me and I had moved on with me life. But even after three long years I can't."

"Hn."

Laughing at his response Hilde walked over to Heero and grabbed his hand. "Heero Yuy, you are the most original human being I have ever meet."

Smirking he let Hilde lead him back through her house and out the front door. Standing in front of his car he got solemn again. He didn't know what to say to her now. Thankfully she did, staring in to his eyes like she always did.

"Thank you."

"For what?" He asked.

"For being there with me. I know we don't really know each other but… I do know that you understand and you'll be there."

"Why do you do that?"

"Do what Heero?"

"Stare into my eyes?" His voice sounded like that of a child but she didn't mind. She remembered someone else asking that.

"Because it's the only way I have the slightest idea about what's going on in your head. You may be the master at masking your face but you eyes are very expressive."

Standing there, in the morning coolness of November, beside Heero's car, staring in to each other's eyes Heero and Hilde found understanding.

Breaking away from him, "Look, I'm going to be late. I guess I'll see you tomorrow morning. Oh yeah." Hilde said walking toward her Jeep. "I hope you don't mind singing."

Smirking again at her laughter he got into his car and drove away.


	4. 4

Shattered Wings

~*~

Heero woke up the next morning at exactly 5:30 a.m. He didn't have to set an alarm; his body just seemed to wake every day at the same time. Opening his eyes, then rolling over to stare at the ceiling he remember what today meant. Today he was getting his assignment. He really didn't know how to feel about it. Like Hilde had said yesterday, he'd been running away from this problem for three years and he still didn't know how he felt. 

Not wanting to linger on his thoughts, Heero through the sheets back and walked into the bathroom, preparing himself for the day.

Driving to the Preventors building in the area and listening to the news on the radio didn't divert Heero's sharp mind to wonder again. Yesterday Hilde had so understood. Not once did he detect sympathy in her eyes. She didn't think he was weak, like he thought he was.

Pulling into the parking lot and parking Heero turned off his car and sat there, breathing deeply, trying to gather himself. Then, remembering everything he had been taught, the Heero Yuy that everyone knew, with the piercing blue eyes and mask of indifference, was back into place.

~*~

The first thing Hilde noticed as she walked down the 4th floor halls was that every person there was nervous. Hilde smiled to herself as she passed a young Preventor fidgeting with his uniform. The news that Lady Une had arrived had everyone trying there best to impress. To Hilde, it was hilarious. They didn't even have the chance to meet Treize. Now that was a man that would make her nervous.

"Excuse me? Miss?"

Hilde stopped and looked at the young blonde in uniform guarding the closed door.

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry but no one's aloud beyond this point without proper identification."

"Oh. Sorry." Hilde said sheepishly. She had been daydreaming not really paying attention. Actually she'd been doing that a lot lately. "Um, here's my clearance card."

Checking the ID and swiping her card the guard returned it back to her and smiled. "Your all clear Miss."

"Thank you."

Continuing on her walk Hilde began to feel nervous, just like when Heero came over to her house. Stopping at the conference room door she was instructed to go to Hilde stopped. She didn't know if she could do this. Entering this room meant that she had to face Duo and Relena. Walking through the door in front of her meant that she would be accepting probably the hardest assignment in her life. 

"Come on Hilde. You're not a 15 anymore. You're a woman now, and it's your time to prove it to everyone."

Squaring her shoulders and saying a silent pray Hilde grasped the doorknob and opened the door.

~*~

Heero and Lady Une had just sat down when Hilde entered the room. He thought that she would look nervous, like she did yesterday, but instead she looked determined. 'Good.' Thought Heero. He knew she had strength and she was going to need it.

"I'm sorry I'm a little late Lady Une."

"Don't worry about it Hilde."

Lady Une, who was still as posed and proper as normal watched the two adults in front of her. She had chosen them specifically for this mission. She personally believed that if one of her Preventors were personally attached to the mission, they would become sloppy, emotional. But these two were different. Treize had taught her that. He saw the potential in Heero, and she had seen the amazing work Hilde could do. Now, this was their test. 

"Let's get to business." Lady said, breaking the silence. "I'm sure Heero has informed you Hilde on some of the current situation. Let me fill you in on the rest." Standing from her chair, Lady Une walked over to the wall window and stared out. "A terrorist group has been attacking and harassing government official. They have killed two colonial representatives from Colony L1853 and one from Colony L4729. We know it's the same group because of clues left behind. Because of are inability to find this group I sent Trowa Barton and his partner Midii Une in to try and find some information. As of this moment, they are still in constant contact with the group themselves. Their information has proved to us that the group's main target is the Vice-Foreign Minister. We also know that they have backing, meaning someone very rich is paying them. The only other information I can give you two is being decoded as we speak. Trowa and Midii can't send that much information without being caught. From what we understand this group knows what they're doing but once the information is decoded we'll send it to you on a secure line."

Turning to face the two Lady Une walked and sat back down before continuing. "I want you two to report to the Sank Kingdom immediately. There will be a flight leaving at 2100 hours tonight, meaning you should arrive there at 1500 in the afternoon. Milliardo and Lucrezia Peacecraft will be expecting you at the airport. You will stay with them in the Peacecraft mansion. Your assignment is relatively easy. Hilde, you and Heero are friends of the Vice-Foreign Minister and are there on a long visit. You will use your regular name and act like normal, at the same time you will be protecting the Minister and watching. We know they will go for her. We'd also like you to try and find out whose backing this group. That's vital information. We have a feeling this person is in the United Earth Sphere government and isn't to pleased with Relena. There's nothing really more for me to say. Trowa and Midii could possible show up with the group and you are NOT to initiate conversation with them for obvious reasons. I trust you two to know what I'm asking. I also know that this is a difficult assignment but I believe in you. You are dismissed."

~*~

Walking out of the building together Hilde remanded confidant. She was a soldier. She had been trained like any one else. Of course the Gundam pilots were special but she also had dealt with the trials of war. 

"Do you have a firearm?"

"Yes. I have my own at home. I only have one though so if you wouldn't mind, could I borrow a 9mm?"

"Sure."

Heero was making a categorized list of everything that he was going to need. Clothes, duh, his laptop, firearms, ammunition, his own personal security system which he would set up once he reported to the Peacecraft mansion. Everything would need to be in order.

"Heero?"

"Hm?"

"I'm going to go home and pack, get everything ready. How about we just meet at the airport about 8:00?"

"That's fine." Stopping he turned and looked at Hilde. "Is there anything else you need?"

"No. I think I'm fine. I'm going to make a run to Joe's though, just in case. He's got all sort of stuff. Anyway, I'll see you then." Hilde then turned toward her car and left. At the moment she wanted so desperately to talk to Heero. She was still confident that she would carry out her mission with success but she was still insecure about seeing Duo and Relena again. Not wanting Heero to think she was weak though she let it go. She also knew that Heero wasn't like most people. Men rarely liked to talk about their feelings in the first place, but Heero rarely talked altogether. 'Oh well.' Hilde thought. 'I'll just suck it up I guess.'

~*~

The ride from Okinawa to the Sank Kingdom took about 8 hours. The shuttle was commercial and fine. Hilde and Heero both worked on their laptops during the ride, collaborating their information and setting up their systems for the work. Afterwards Hilde pulled out a book from her carry-on bag.

"What are you reading?"

"Oh." Hilde said as she blushed. "It's a historical romance novel. I know that most people think they're cheesy but I enjoy them. Do you read?"

"Sometimes."

"What?"

"Um, mostly history books." Heero replied.

"You enjoy history?" Asked Hilde, a little taken back that Heero read.

"Yes. I enjoy learning and history can tell you many things."

"I agree totally. I've actually been thinking about going to college. I really don't know what I want to do. I'm a great mechanic and can fix any computer but I don't want to spend my whole life as a Preventor back up and mechanic. Not that I don't love to take things apart and fix them but I want more out of life. Maybe I could even adopt a kid."

"Why adopt?" Heero asked looking at her. 

"I… I want kids. Of my own I mean but I don't know if I could even find someone that would except me. I know I'm desirable, that's not what I meant, it's just, something. Something's always missing. I haven't found it yet and I know it's a bit pessimistic but I don't think I ever will. I guess I have high expectations. My mother told me before she died that I should marry the man who could read my thoughts, who could take me dancing in the stars, who would read to me while I'm pregnant, but most of all, I should marry the man who knows me inside and out and believed in me and our love. She said that when she meet my dad she just knew. Must be nice." Hilde finished. She wasn't staring out the window or at Heero, just sitting there, staring off into space, and recalling her thoughts.

"Why'd your mother die?" Heero asked. He was curious. She spoke with so much love when she mentioned her mother. He kind of wished he could remember more of his mom.

"She had complication after birthing my little brother. When Christian died because of heart failure, my mother thought it was her fault. She never showed her depression to me but I could tell something was off. Through the years she just started to get weaker and weaker until she finally was bedridden. I was 10 when she died. It didn't hurt that much because she told right before she died that she wasn't afraid. She said that she was sorry that she wouldn't there in person but that she would always look out for me. They say she died because of ovarian cancer but I think it was just her time to go. My dad never got over her death though. He withdrew into himself for a long time. I became a typical anger teenager until OZ came. I wanted to see the world so I joined up."

"Is your father still alive?"

"Yeah. He's on a side colony. He loves it where he is and I visit him occasionally." Stopping, Hilde turned to look at Heero. "What about you Heero? Do you remember your mother? Father?"

"Hn."

Seeing the look on his face Hilde knew she'd gone to far. "I'm sorry. You can tell me if you'd like because I'd love to hear about them but I'm not forcing you." Hilde smiled at his face and reached down to squeeze his hand. Then, settling into her chair she began to read.

~*~

"Ladies and Gentlemen, we have just arrived to the Sank Kingdom. I hope you enjoyed your flight."

With their carry on baggage on their shoulder, Heero and Hilde walked down the ramp together. The butterflies were so strong now that Hilde, with out thinking, reached for Heero's hand and squeezed. When she realized what she had done she tried to excuse herself and pull away but she noticed that Heero was squeezing her hand back. They held on tightly until the entrance came into sight and then let go.

After they collected their other luggage they headed outside where their ride awaited. 

"Heero."

Heero stopped in front of the speaker. Milliardo. He was only slightly taller than Heero now but he was the same, with his ice blue eyes and long white blonde hair. Beside him stood Lucrezia Noin. She was also the same but her stomach was protruding, showing that they were expecting another child.

"Zechs."

"Hello Hilde." Noin said softly, noticing the girl's hesitant expression.

"Hello Ms. Noin. Oh, I'm sorry, it's Mrs. Peacecraft now isn't it?"

"Yes." Noin replied laughing. "Don't worry about it Hilde. I get that all the time."

"Shall we?" Milliardo asked while staring at Heero. He noticed that this wasn't the boy he'd seen the last time he encountered Heero. This person in front of him was a man.

"Yes. Hilde?"

"Of course."

Sitting in the back of Milliardo's Expedition Hilde tried not to be so scared but she couldn't. She was terrified. Noticing her fear Heero reached for her hand this time. Not making a deal of it Hilde held his strong hand, relaxing from the warmth radiating off of it. In the rear view mirror Milliardo watched the action and smiled to himself. He hoped the two in the back seat helped each other. He hoped they realized how lucky the were to have found each other. If they didn't, he didn't know what would happen during their stay.


End file.
